I was ‘single-mom status’ for almost a decade of my sons life. For the most part I navigated the infant, baby, toddler, and child stages rather well even though my son was certainly no saint. I definitely had more than a parents fair share of red lights, extra teacher conferences, and his strong will that questioned everything.
But, we made it out of the kid stage. And I would like to say I am proud of who my son was. He had compassion for others, a keen sense of what was good and what was evil, and a lot of biblical knowledge. Go me!
But goodness gracious I never gave much thought to the “teen years” until they were slapping me upside the head. My young man just turned 14 and I must start with saying I still am proud of who he is. He still has compassion, he still understands biblical matters in more than a surface way, and he still knows the difference between right and wrong even though his frontal lobe is still under construction.
When people warned me about teen-dom I brushed it off to be quite honest. Me and my little guy were two peas in a pod and I daydreamed that my son would be the culture changer for Christ within his sphere of influence. Defying all the odds…son of a single mother makes it to his wedding day, pure and un-defiled.
Oh my gosh, I actually thought this. Not that I think it still can’t happen, but now I am reevaluating my goals and motives in parenting. I am seeing that this is a human heart I am dealing with and not some poster for good behavior I am painting to hang on the walls of the Godly mom museum.
I’ve had to stop caring about what others think of my family and only concern myself with what God is doing in our lives.
I’ve had to let go of the fear that my son may entertain, or gasp… live in some kind of repugnant sin for a season because I need to trust the Holy Spirits dealings with him.
I’ve had to allow him to make some simple decisions for himself now even though they are not my decisions because in four short years the law allows him to make all of his own decisions.
I’ve had to let go of the adult life I envision for my son because I need to leave room for God to change those plans. (I will still use prayer as my secret weapon!)
As I raise my teenager with prayer, confidence, and the wisdom of the word, God is using this privilege as another means to show me that he is sovereign and I must look to him to help guide all the precious matters in my life.
I am not sure how my son’s life will turn out. Tomorrow is not even promised to any one of us! I will however, love him each day he is under my guidance, teach him the truth, and let God be God in his life. God is big enough for the task.